sonja lekovic

Chargers

- Good afternoon, I’m from the Magic Real Estate, nice to meet you, please, come inside, let me show you around. As you can see there are 2 bedrooms, a living room and a kitchen, solar power, voice command unit and an invisible storage, and the whole place has been fully charged by our very best couple. You’ll be excited, enthusiastic and inspired for the next 6 months, depending on your own energy levels, maybe even a year.

- What’s up with Angie and her boyfriend? I haven’t seen them around lately.
- They’ve been working a lot… “charging”… It’s a new thing on the housing market, increases the sales price double and they get 20%. They’re doing great I hear, the agents are fighting over them. It’s not easy to find good chargers these days. Right now they’re already booked for 2 entire buildings, 5 houses, 6 apartments…
- And what is their actual job?
- They’re making love in every room.

© sonja lekovic

Brain surgery

- I wonder why he doesn’t do it himself, he obviously needs it…
- Who are you talking about?
- The Professor.
- Ah yes… well… I’m sure he knows something we don’t.
- What about you Leela, would you do it?
- Oh I don’t have that kind of money.
- But still, what would you change?
- Hmmm… I’d like to be more creative I think…
- More creative?! Girl. You are incredibly creative. Trust me.

- Professor? I’m terribly sorry to disturb you sir, but we have a patient here who paid the extra emergency fee to be operated today. He wants to be perfect before the New Year you see.
- New Year?! Who the fuck gives a damn about the New Year?! It’s 2099! Haven’t we all had enough of new years?! And he paid extra to be perfect, who does he think he is?! Have you told him it’s not that easy to fix a jerk in one procedure?!
- This would be his 365^th procedure sir.
- Oh a regular one, I see… and what does he want now?
- To be more sensitive sir.
- Oh god. People are just hilarious. All right, put him to sleep.

- Sir… I think we might have a problem. I entered the patients’ request code into his profile and the computer found a match.
- A uniqueness issue? We never had that… Well, what do you know, there seems to be another perfect asshole like him in this world…
- Actually sir… the match would be with himself. After the procedure the patient would be exactly the same as he was before the first one he ever had… And I don’t think he’s aware of that… Should we wake him up to confirm?
- Aha-ha-ha! Hilarious I tell you! No! Stupid fuck! That’s his problem! Cut him open! Where’s the photographer?
- I’m right here sir.
- Shoot his brains!
- You know professor, sometimes I think you don’t really need these photos but simply want the opportunity to say “shoot his brains”.
- You’re damn right kid, you’re damn right! Now shoot his brains.

© sonja lekovic